Yesterday we went to the airport to pick Daddy up. He went to Baltimore for a work conference and was gone for several days. The boys missed him, and were excitedly waiting as close as they could to the exit from security. Waiting was hard for them.
We’re sort of in a holding pattern these days. Waiting, waiting. It’s less than seven weeks until baby number 3’s due date. (Although judging by my first two that doesn’t mean much). Sometimes I just want to burst with anticipation. I just want him to come now and quit all the waiting.
But I do have some anxiety about it as well. Life is going pretty well for us right now. I mean…parenting is never easy, and we are reminded of that every day with our five and two year olds. But all in all we really are in a smooth section of life.
Elias is loving school, making progress in pretty much every aspect of his life. Swimming, basketball, reading, social skills, independence and responsibility, faith and more. He has been working on a rocketship lego project for a few days and finished it this afternoon while Simon was napping. He really did it pretty much on his own (with Nathan looking on to double check his work).
He amazes me every day, and while another little brother will be a huge blessing for him, it’s going to mess up his life and routine for awhile, and change his life forever. It’s odd to be so excited for the little one, and yet be sad because things will never be this way again.
And Simon. He teaches me every day how I can simultaneously love someone so much while also be driven crazy. He’s got so much spunk. So much will. So much love to give. He’s got a lot going on right now with learning how to play with friends, giving up his binky, and all the other transitions. He wants to grow up too fast. He’s in an art class right now one day a week. He made this rainbow necklace and told me to take a picture. This is his “cheese” face.
I love these boys to death, and I feel we are just playing the waiting game. Waiting for things to fall apart and become crazy and different and hard. And waiting for our new little blessing to arrive and make our hearts unfold and expand for all the love we’ll gain.
Maybe it’s just the pregnancy hormones making my moods swing wildly. Maybe it’s just nerves. The waiting place is a hard place to be.